Reality hopped

 Some how i reality hopped into an advanced Equestria along with Tender Hoof. I could feel the wind hitting my feathers and it felt so good.There were ponies everywhere and it felt good just be among them.We were inside some sort of aquarium and planetarium mix. There was some sort of event going on.

Friends

 Had a really big surprise this morning all of my friends from ponyville had dream visited me. 

Family

 I remembered another family i had that accepted me . Iron Hoof and Tender Hoof.

My life after GM

 When I finally got out of Great mother's service I went to canterlot to my mom and dad's place. As soon as I knocked on the door. Mom answered the door and I wanted to cry so much. She just stood there in complete shock and before I knew it I was engulfed in a hug. I was ushered inside and I had found out that Twi was no longer living back at home. Mom and Dad wanted to know what had happened. Over some tea I told her everything that i had been through my intense training by GM and her major Domo. After a while of questions they were very angry with what i had endured. They had sent a message to Sunny Skies(Princess Celestia) I had returned and she had come over to visit. I was given a massive hug. They explained what i had been through to mother. I don't much what happened after that i just found myself back in my bed.

Most what i can remember is a blur. I know that may change. Most of my friends had graduated and had moved on to other parts of Equestria. Sunny Diamond had moved to cloudsdale to start her new job with the weather factory. The next day i flew to Cloud Dale to visit my family there and visit one of my best friends. Turns she just ended her shift when i saw her. The shock on her face was priceless. She tackled me in a hug. We spent the next couple hours just talking about everything even  everything I had been through. She really wasn't very happy at the training I had to endure. She told me that my other friends here in the city some had gone to wingopolis while others had stayed with the city. As we made our rounds i ran into some old friends Spits and another friend I don't remember  her name. After some time I made to mom and dad's place both were outside just enjoying the weather. Before I could even land they both tackled me with hug. Spent the next few weeks in both canterlot and Cloudsdale writing to my friends and getting more relaxed at being back. Shining had entered the guard also seeing my twin sister caddy. Also had learn Dash gone off to live in ponyville. At that time I was doing a part time job with the weather team for canterlot. My friend Sunny had helped me get the job. At that time I just wanted a fresh start and i run into Rainbow. It felt good to see her again. She mentioned Ponyville and that it was very small town. That i should give it a try. She help me move to ponyville. Since she was on the weather team there all i had to do was ask my captain if i could switch teams. With the paperwork filled out I was on my way to Ponyville. I bunked with dash for few months and made a few friends in town.

I saved up every bit i could plus the 2k bits from the government every pony gets per month. I was able to buy own small house. WIth some magic I able to increase its size within. I also while bunking with dash I would give money as rent she wanted to refuse because i was her and sister. She would have none of it. Instead i used the money to stock her fridge with food.

I spent the next few years working on the weather team part time while Dash had made captain. I had made a few friends around town. Strawberry, Aj, Rarity, Fluttershy, and Pinks just name a few. Any time I would go some where i would explain that yes I'm alicorn and no I'm not a princess. 

When it came to defeating Nightmare Moon it was an act of love that distracted the Darkling. That what gave my friends and I the chance to become the elements and direct them against Moon. Freeing my aunt and also revealing a secret to my other friends. Which they were shocked at but given time didn't really think much of it. Promised never to reveal it.It was a special type of magic that allowed anyone with it to be free to discuss anything but if it came to the secret itself they would forget what they were talking about.Only the one who cast it could bring someone within the circle.

Coming out

 I just remembered something as I was coming back after I had gotten my brother out of another mess I saw Cadance and shining armor pass by on a coach. The look in her eyes was hurt as I had missed the wedding. My brother still acting goofy thought would cover for him again. I told him when I see my friends that I would come clean about the messes I got him out of and all the accuses I had made for not being at certain events. On the way back to ponyville me and my brother had gotten into a heated exchange. He would always guilt trip me into covering for him or promise him something. It wasn't easy to tell Twi and company where i had been and what happened. How close he and I had been to death. The sheer disappointment on their faces made me want to cry. Afterwards they had wanted to talk amongst themselves. I was worried that they didn't want to be friends with me after all this because of all the excuses.   I had teleported away towards one of AJ outward sheds in the back of her property. I created a opaque field and as part that field I made it so no one could hear me. I cried and I cried till Twi broke through my field. All my friends were there and they hugged me. They told me that they forgave me and that everything would be ok.

Unpleasant training gaining perspective

 GM wanted to teach me perspective on what it was like to be male and to understand them better by forcing me to become one. I really didn't like it and it didn't feel right. I spent about a 6 months and had my mindset altered too for experience. I can remember telling others that i was the son of Celestia. Though times I would remember being female but it like trying to grasp at air. GM reverted me back. Its like I was watching someone use my body and i was along for the ride. She took an alternate me and brought him in. Merged the two of together thus letting me have that experience but also letting him of that same experience as a mare for a different perspective. Gm returned the both to our realities. How GM did this was it was an alternate self was teaching her student a new perspective. I didn't like it one bit but it gave me what i needed to learn about males.    

Training by Great Mother

 I was teenage filly when i was trained in various ways of disabling enemies. GM felt the best way to train against something was to actually face it directly. There are some memories when i think of them left terrified beyonds words. I can face it but it scares me to the core. Darkness not abstract concept of something without light. This is a thing that corrupts everything in it wake. GM would always watch and intervene at the last second if i failed to defend myself. It wasn't easy. It felt like diving into cold water and you feel like you can't breath. Like very life is being sucked out of you. To defend yourself you must embrace your own darkness and find balance within yourself. Your light won't be extinguished. Doesn't mean I wasn't hurt by any of these experiences.I used to cry myself to sleep from missing home plus getting hurt by all the training majordomo of GM was teaching me fighting styles. He was tough and yet fair to a degree. He didn't like it when i cried but over time that went away. And I became better at defending myself from both magic and physical attacks. I remember i had question for gm one day "What was it like to be her?" She showed me with guiding presence. She showed me earth and let me experience everything at once for only a second. I was literally everything on that world from the trees to the lowest life form all within a second. It overwhelmed me but she helped me process all the information and understand it over time. Funny thing was all of this was a span of 3 to 4 year equestrian time when actually it felt like i had been for thousands of years. Most of what i had learned I didn't want those powers or the advanced abilities that came from them. I still don't them. To be like GM and my answer is no.So when people are so obsessed with ascending to a higher plane and they so willing to give up on family or friends. Then I would its really not worth it. That's just my point of view. 

The many places i was sent to. I was sent there to solve a problem and in many cases I came away with children of my own. Since i could travel in time thanks to what GM taught me. Learning about magic was an extreme passion of mine and was done on my own time. I would always be careful not to leave any traces of myself for others to follow me. I learned from gm how to shift my form from one thing to another. The core you would always stay the same just shifting your vibration slightly would allow you to take on different forms. Many unicorns and other of the same family have learned to shape shift something the changelings do on a whole different level. But i digress getting off topic. Life wasn't easy under GM's tutelage. When i returned to Equestria I did so because it was my own choice to leave. GM left me go and told me if wanted to go down that path in the future it would be there for me. To become like her. I told her that wasn't for me and it didn't feel right. To that she smiled at me. Like she knew it could end this way. She was a hard yet fair teacher. Confusing as hell.  

One last thing my brother Emerald had the same training as i did,

Old Memories New Details

 Sunny and I were coming home from her house. We were joking around and laughing. I'm telling really bad jokes. Mom(twilight velvet was going meet us. There lots ponies on that bridge day. I just remember hearing a cracking like something was falling apart. I don’t know what had me think of flying under the bridge . Sunny followed me as we could see cracks forming . I could see the terrified look on my friends face. Without thinking I tried to use my magic to hold up the bridge I was barely able to hold it. I turned to sunny and told her to get everyone off the bridge. While at the same time I could feel my horn hurting so much. I remember screaming in pain. Then there was this strange booming sound and it’s like sudden in flux of magic. I felt like I could do anything and holding the bridge up was easy. I also wanted to keep everyone safe twilight velvet (mom)was on that bridge too. So magic was going through me. Then the magic was gone in a flash. I passed out. Only to wake up in a hospital bed. The room was an off color light blue with a small bed side table along with a small chair right across from the bed. There was also another chair off to the left. When I woke up the lights were out and it was dark outside I could barely see. Right across the room was a unicorn and on my left I knew someone was there. At that moment I felt drained like ever mussel in my body ached and I felt so I tired. I was scared but comforting feeling over came me and I soon fell asleep. I was in the hospital for over a week and half. From  what i can remember the doctor had said Sunny had saved my life and that I had magic exhaustion . I had my mark though I couldn't fly or use magic for the next three weeks. Sunny and my other friends would often visit me. I also got scolded from both my sets of parents along with my siblings Dash,Twi and Shining.

Home

 My house in town. It has a short roof on it with navy blue siding with door that is painted off color white. Its next to the tea shop in the center of town.I  When I'm working in clouds dale I have a small small apartment in the sky district.I just remembered the name of the street. Horse shoe lane. I can see the sign I can make out of the other signs but they are blurry. The farmer's market is on the west side of town. I would often for go teleporting there or flying preferring just to walk there sometimes. Sometimes i would see Aj selling her apples there. She had the best apples in all of equestria. Sweet and crunchy. Sometimes walking past her farm I could smell the apples on the wind.

Quest for finding Emerald

 The idea how I incarnate was planned . That everything was random was false. This was a plan from the get go events were arranged to the best of our abilities. Some of the events that happened to me growing up were unplanned. Twi and bunch of us had one mission to bring Emerald home. The idea was once I found him we would be extracted by one of two ways either through the dream realm or in the physical domain both failed. It leaves the only is to live out our lives here. I never thought that I would meet other Equestrians here and some would become my dearest friends. Regardless when we pass we are going home. The reason I was packed to go was because I had experience because I’ve been incarnated before. Things never go as planned. I don’t think the girls are going to give up.

Connections

 Something I remembered from the time I spent in the sanctuary I was bullied by the other foals as I wasn't as tall as they were. I was different than they were.i just remembered it took me a long time to heal from that experience. Even my mom soul sharing with her friends to give us all the stable families to grow up in. I was new to the whole thing. I thought i was a burden to them both Windy Whistles and Bow and the Sparkle clan. I used to cry a lot. They opened up there hearts. I gained family and friends. Twilight Velvet used to help me fall sleep. Twi ,Shining and Rainbow gained 5 new siblings and they opened their hearts. When i once was talking to him I was saying how i was damaged and he got really angry told that wasn't damaged. I guess i still carry the hurt around with me. I just buried it and tried to move on from it. Twi once climbed into bed with me as I was crying once. This when Twi was filly way before she became my mother student. I relative terms I was only a year or two older than Twi. Its hard to type it. I can still feel the hurt.

new memories

 I kept hearing about these so called great hunts that the humans had been doing and it was sort of in the past. So my brother and I made a plan to travel back to the point in time and rescue those unicorns. It was fairly easy to do. We ran ahead of the unicorns and I told them to follow my brother while i would lead the humans on a wild goose chase. I made myself slightly out of phase and used a light clone as well to confuse the humans. My brother got them safely back to the sanctuary and I got there a little afterwards picking a few foals who got lost. GM knew what I did and yet she wasn't angry her major domo was extremely angry with me. Yelled at me and tossed me out of one the gardens though when gm found she yelled at him. That was first time i had ever heard her yell. Also the unicorns we rescued went to live on in the sanctuary. The humans were hunting them for sport. The foals who were crying and Emerald made them laugh.

Living

 Sometime you have to live through pain and learn at least it seems that how it appears here. That some people who you think are friends here in this turn to be less than friends. Who only want to use you for their own ends. I don't know where my path will take me in this life. But once it ends here I'm never coming back to this world ever again and as far as humanity is concerned there are coming storms that will test humanity on a scale the likes of which they have never seen before. Things are in motion ,Change is in motion. Either go with or it will crush you in its wake.

Pain

 Kind of dug an old memory of sorts. The week after Aunty Lu got banished mom sent us way through a portal. I remembered I cried a lot along with my sisters and brother. I spent the next 1000 year in the unicorn sanctuary a place that is outside of time. My father never really kept any of his promises and I would get shuffled around between sisters and brothers. Every once in a while i would get to see my Twin sisters and my other sister and brother. Given names that were translation of our equestrian names into light language. I remember telling somepony that my name was Radiant Dawn and they would keep calling me Ko'onthra. Over time I just kind of accepted it. I guess there is some resentment there to what happened and being given a new name while living outside of equestria. Now its in the past but still hurts. At the time I felt like i had been abandoned. Like I wasn't wanted. There were times I cried myself to sleep. A few of my older sisters became mother figures to me. 

The fun of research

  In my reality we did the research on the elements even finding how the crystalline structure allowed for the energy to focus through the lattices. Also finding out that the pony was the source of the energy being taken then focused through certain type of lens thus allowing for the transfer of energy. All of the elements were connected through a harmonic field thus allowing them to come together. Also found that Tree of Harmony has a great deal of control over the elements through harmonic energy besides it being connected to Twi's castle which allowed it to use map to pin point areas of disharmony and use whatever ponies as a means of proxies to solve the disharmony going on. Further research on the tree back fired in a way that effected all ponies in my reality. In the attempt to map the crystalline structure of the tree and boost its effectiveness lead to a harmonic wave. I did see how the tree how the tree was connected to everything and the effects of us returning our elements to her. It was found the elements through their use would copy the vibrational signature of the pony wielding it and thus this would be shared with the tree upon returning the elements. The tree itself is an energy being of sort I hadn't seen before in Equestria . I found out that the physical form was just a proxy along with its other connections. As a element bearer I can tell when  the tree is in distress and can act to defend it as can any of the element bearers. Was also able to grow harmony crystals as a means of creating new elements of harmony based off what I learned from the tree and the elements. Wasn't to hard though with the help of my friends. To describe what the harmonic wave was it was a massive release of harmonic energy though the side effects were instant. It healed and gave every pony immortality to a point. The point being they could still die if by accident. Also it returned those of an advanced age to middle age in an instant. It also was later discovered that the tree had full control over the release of this energy and its desired effects. The tree also created a harmonic shield around itself though element bearers could freely pass through said shield as we were harmonically attuned to the shields frequency.

Doing research on how Twi's castle to could detect areas of disharmony was alot of fun in try to figure it out. we then made few discoveries in which Twi's castle acts like radar of sorts sending out sub  frequencies of harmonic energy and show it in real time.Part of the tree acts like a computer that processes the information coming in. It was also found that Twi's castle had defences of sort in regards that it could erect a shield around ponyville if the need were to ever arise. Though umm we accidentally caused the shield to be deployed took a few days for us to turn it off. There were other things within her castle that were of great interest such a hidden library of book made by Starswirl the bearded which greatly excited Twi in the extreme. I guess when the Twi castle was forming his collected works were part of the information and the library section too. I did learn in the outer realms how to grow cities and other advanced forms of magic. Starswirl attempts here were on the cutting edge of equestrian magic though in the greater sense they be viewed by an outsiders as baby steps to full child being able to walk in terms of civilizations growth. The research the went into this wasn't just me. It was Twi,Sunset,Starlight and Sunburst who helped make it a reality.        

traveling to new places

 Had another out of body experience I got visit Sunny and her friends for a short time. Somepony had a loud me to channel through them. It felt so good just be back in equestria for a short time. I got to introduce myself to them. They were very happy and Sunny's father was alive. I was able to talk to Sunny and her friends that they achieved something great. I had informed them that there others in the world that needed friendship. I also made a promise to return there if they needed me as a friend. Was in a toy shop and talking to few ponies till I lost focus. After this experience I feel at peace.

So desperate to talk to somepony

 I just have the overwhelming urge just to talk to another pony. Anypony to be exact. I don't mean to really  just to talk or well in this case type. I just need to talk some pony. I really wish i could make some good friends here. There are few good friends. I just wish i could just talk to fellow kin well I guess I already just wish I could relate more.Sometimes I worry that I will mess up and drive them way. I really suck at this. 

More memories

 Had a bit more of memory pop up from when i destroyed my mom's tower. Well there were 5 of us alicorns there 4 sisters and 1 brother. Sunset, me , Cadance, Dawn Light, and Emerald Night.Light didn't want to get into trouble and just watched us. Sunny had learned a new spell she had wanted to show us. Em, me and Caddy tried the new magic. Sunny was showing off that could use the offensive spell with ease by blowing up small boulders and not wanting feel out left we joined her. After while Sunny and i got into a contest of who could destroy the largest boulders. That's part where missed and hit moms tower blowing it up. We all knew how much trouble we were in so we decided to try and keep it a secret. Didn't last long cause Light confessed and the rest kind went downhill from there. Mom had in her room looking down at me with that kind look that moms have. She knew i had did it though i kept saying I wasn't there and that i was over friends house. She then asked which friend and I couldn't think of what to say. Eventually then truth came out which lead to another line questions who taught you that spell. We all cracked and revealed it was Sunny which lead to all of us being grounded. Besides that my sister Light was always the quite one while Sunny was a trailblazer. Back then she could be a bit arrogant and even stubborn hell we were all stubborn in our own way. I just remember one she wasn't there and no pony knew where she was and mom wouldn't tell me where she was. That really hit me hard.  She and I always had a friendly rivalry as sisters though in my neck of woods she my paternal twin sister along with Caddy.  We just sort drifted apart a little bit. Sunny was the glue that kept us all together. We each sort us went our own ways along having different spheres of friends. Still love one another. Who knows how things would have turned out if Sunny had stayed.(edited)

[1:36 PM]

One last thing me being taught magic by great mother was a choice I made which took me away from my family for 7 years in Equestrian time. It had been a year after getting my cutie mark. She ended sending me to different parts of the fae realms and other places to solve problems. In those places i learned about different magic and technologies. Some even took me far into the past and some into the distant future. It was hard road till one day i came home. A lot of happy faces along with reconnecting with friends I had. I had changed a bit. Mom had me promise that i wouldn't show any pony the books i had wrote or the inventions I had created. The way she had said it could have dire effects on Equestria's natural evolution of magic. Over the years i found loop holes that i could help my friends in subtle ways with my tech. An example would be everything that Equestria took as sold fact was wrong in so many ways. Like unicorns couldn't become as powerful as Starlight or the portals that many used were extremely primitive compared to other places.That some magics that were dead ends in equestria had whole branching trees of research of their own

Also one final thing I kept Communication devices with my friends from home throughout my journey. I kept in constant contact with them. I don’t think I could’ve made it through everything I’ve been through without them. Because I knew them since I was a filly.

Sunny Diamond

 Sunny Diamond one of my best friends growing up. Used to have sleepovers at her parents house in canterlot's south side a small stream flowed by her house. She was always telling me to be patient and i would get my cutie mark. That's the conversation we were having on that day. I can remember how she got her cutie mark we were playing around with clouds that day seeing if we could make funny shapes with them and laughing. She made this one cloud it really looked really cool and she got her mark. She was so excited and I was extremely happy for my friend. She was very understanding and a good friend. She got a job at the weather factory molding clouds. Every cloud has her signature touch to it. Eventually she made supervisor and was charge of whole department. After work the both of us would meet at a local donut shop where we would unwind from a long day and just chat. I would always make the time to go visit when i didn't have work. Just as she would make the time as well.

Cutie marks and rediscovering an old friend

 I agree with you. With mine is a heart with 3 stars and wings coming out of it. I just know I was a late bloomer and tried lot of advanced magic which got me into a lot trouble. I was coming home from a friends house i had slept over her name was Sunny Diamond and we were crossing the old stone bridge in canterlot. I heard crumbling sound and I didn't think I just took flight and flew under the bridge. Saw it was falling apart and I just used my magic to hold up the the whole bridge. I can remember the pain in both my wings and horn. My friend had flown down and i told her to get everypony off the bridge. I also remember some sort of booming sound and being given huge in flux of magic. It felt really good like I could do anything. Then I woke up in a hospital bed from the image i could see somepony sitting in a chair at the end of my bed.I felt so weak and tired. For me I tend to follow my heart. I love learning about magic and how its tied to the land. Also flying everything about the freedom of being able to go where ever you please. Feeling the wind as it passes over your wings just feels really good. For me my cutie mark it an an extension of myself as I see it as for meaning I think its hope and change.